Régulièrement, je me félicite d'avoir changé d'hébergeur pour aller acheter un Crazy Domain Insane chez Dreamhost. Ils sont drôlement bien, ces p'tits gars[1]. L'autre jour, ils ont décidé, comme ça, de décupler les boîtes courriel physiques de leurs hébergements (y compris, bien sûr, les existants), et de quintupler les comptes ftp/shell/etc.
Genre.
Et là, c'est reparti. Plutôt que de vous faire tout un laïus, et pour vous donner une idée de l'ambiance, je retranscris ci-dessous leur dernière newsletter clients :
0. Introduction.
1. Good news!
2. Bad news!
3. Good news!
4. Charities, they are a changin'
5. DHSOTM.
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0. Introduction.
Happy November 2004 DreamHost newsletter everybody! How was (if you are
American) your Thanksgiving? Mine was fine... I just did the usual.
Trotted over to Istanbul where I went bowling. After getting three
strikes in a row I quit smoking on the spot. So, pretty exciting days. I
only wish I'd gotten a little turkey along the way.
Anyway, that's all a distant memory now, what with the November
newsletter coming out its standard 2-3 days into December. Sorry! But
at least I have some good news and some bad news and then some good news
again! So strap yourself in to your good-news/bad-news/good-news seats
and hang on tight...
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1. Good news!
First the good news: The tests are in and all DreamHost customers have
24 hours to live! The bad news is I meant to send this newsletter out
yesterday. HA! (I guess the good news is if you're reading this the
tests were off by a day.)
The other GOOD news is we've just added a new great free "goodie" for
everybody to gobble up. Now you can install WordPress, the fast, full-
featured, stable, low-carb, easy-to-use, free, open source weblog
software on any fully-hosted DreamHost domain with just one click here:
https://panel.dreamhost.com/?tree=goodies.wordpress
Wordpress is pretty much just like Movable Type, which a lot of you may
be familiar with.. in fact, once you've installed it you can even
convert a Movable Type blog (or a bunch of other types) over to it
pretty easily by following the instructions you get emailed!
Why didn't we make it so you could just install Movable Type itself with
one click instead? Somewhat because Movable Type is a commercial product,
and they would require us to do some sort of weird registration for all
our users with them in order to even install the free version. Also,
WordPress doesn't require "rebuilding" your blog every time you publish.
Mostly though, installing WordPress was eleven times easier for us.
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2. Bad news!
The good news is traffic to your website is growing like crazy! The bad
news is it's from all those warez files uploaded by the d00d who hacked
your site. HA! (I guess the good news is hey, more warez for you!)
(Disclaimer: that was a joke. We do not condone piracy of any kind and
any illegal dealings of any kind are of course grounds for immediate
account termination without refund, d00dz!)
The other BAD news is, we're immediately discontinuing that policy we
added a few months ago about dropping the highest day from people's
monthly bandwidth usage calculations. We're sorry! But we DO have some
semi-good reasons for removing it:
1. It was really confusing for some people.
2. Some of those people worked for DreamHost.
3. Some of them even programmed the feature.
4. Some people weren't confused by it at all, and in fact set up
31 different sub-domains which each would only serve huge files
one day a month! Way to ruin it for everybody, d00dz.
Sorry folks! BUT, maybe the next section will make up for it a bit...
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3. Good news!
Hey, good news: I'm almost done writing this newsletter! But, bad news:
I write it in reverse order. HA! (I guess the good news is I'm also
dyslexic.)
And the other GOOD news is, for the month of December, starting just
before you got this newsletter, all new shared hosting plans get TRIPLE
the normal bandwidth allotment.. for the entire life of the plan! That
means our plans now look like:
Crazy Domain Insane: 120GB/month!
Sweet Dreams: 144GB/month!!
Code Monster: 192GB/month!!!
Strictly Business: 264GB/month!!!!
But wait that's not all. You don't think we'd leave out all our awesome
current customers, did you? Noooooo, of course not... especially since
the only people reading this newsletter ARE current customers! That'd be
like the time when I called up all my homeless friends to tell them
about how totally sweet my new Bentley handled.
So, guess what? As of right now, all current shared hosting plans ALSO
get triple their current bandwidth allotments.. FOREVER! Don't say
DreamHost never gave you some good news after some bad news after some
good news, d00dz!
Oh yeah, we also dropped the overage price for bandwidth to just $1/GB
on CDI and SD, and just $0.50/GB on CM and SB. Of course that's pretty
much moot at this point.. who's ever going to go over these new limits!
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4. Charities, they are a changin'
The good news is, we've got some new charities to donate to.. Project
Spera and Scholarship America, both educational. The bad news is, you
can no longer donate to the Sierra Club or the Wikimedia Foundation. The
good news is, we got $311.22 from 21 donors for the Wikimedia Foundation
and $350 from 14 donors for the Sierra Club, and then matched them!
The bad news is, there's no joke in there.
The good news is, go donate via DreamHost to these two new charities at:
https://panel.dreamhost.com/?tree=home.charity
and get your donations matched! This is the season for giving! Almost as
much as it is the season for receiving!
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5. DHSOTM.
The good news is this month's DHSOTM winner is NOT a flash-based
personal portfolio!!!!!
http://www.visualsubjectmatter.com/
A store and "urban art" gallery in Orange Country, California.
The bad news is, their site still uses flash.
The good news is, you can submit your OWN hopefully flash-free site to
be voted on by your Happy DreamHost Peers at:
https://panel.dreamhost.com/?tree=home.dhsotm
The bad news is, there's no prize other than mention in a newsletter
with an estimated subscriber base of about 22.
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The good news is,
Josh!
The bad news is if you want to unsubscribe, go to:
https://panel.dreamhost.com/id/?tab=contact
The good news is, please don't!
Pom polom...